Bendtner’s Boo Boo(s)

The Danish football player, Nicklas
, is all over the
news/tv/radio/facebook/twitter. Again. For all the wrong reasons. Again, again!
Okay, so in the past he might have shown the occasional flash of brilliance on
grønsværen (the pitch) but these days he’s best known for his playboy
lifestyle, bad-boy antics and high profile girlfriends. Plus a rather large ego
to boot! ;)
Which may be your typical profile of a footballer in the UK – but here in
Denmark (with the Law of Jante peering out from behind every bush) it’s a
definite ‘no no’.

The kids and I watching the national team at Parken

The kids and I watching the national team at

In the past he’s been fined for speeding. Vandalizing cars. Attended his
girlfriend’s celebrity birthday party the very weekend that, surprise surprise,
he was unable to play football due to an injury. Kicked a hotel guest in the
shoulder. Shown his underpants – emblazened with a betting company logo – in
direct contravention of UEFA rules, during a national match. And – my own
personal favourite – he had difficulties paying with his credit card in a
pizzeria and apparently demanded to get them free with those immortal words,
“Don’t you know who I am? I could buy this whole place!” But the owner wasn’t
having any of it, stood firm and refused. An episode which spawned the
following joke:

  • Banke, banke på!
  • Hvem der?
  • Bendnter.
  • Bendtner hvem?
  • Nicklas Bendtner! Ved du ikke hvem jeg er?!
  • Knock, knock!
  • Who’s there?
  • Bendtner!
  • Bendtner who?
  • Nicklas Bendtner! Don’t you know who I am?!

And what has Bendtner, the silly klaphat (clapping hat = Danish slang for a complete idiot), gone and
done now? Well, on Saturday night he was caught drink driving in Copenhagen.
Down a one-way street. With an expired licence. Not just a little over the
limit. Three times over the limit. (A few drinks more would have meant a
prison sentence.) He’s in court today and will no doubt lose his driving
licence for three years. And is looking at a very hefty fine. How much? Well, in
Denmark it’s usually the blood alcohol percentage multiplied by the amount of
your net monthly salary… But his lawyer is – selvfølgelig – ready to
fight that. Meanwhile he’s been thrown out of Denmark’s official squad for 6
months and told to consider his future.

Everyone is asking, “Will he ever grow up?” Um, he’s 25 – maybe it’s already
too late?

Have a terrific Tuesday – and let’s drive carefully out there! ;)